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Goodbye to everything

I totally didn't blog the whole summer.

I didn't touch my planner the whole summer.

dunno. I feel like im being this totally different person and i guess I'm losing my love for blogging.

Shoot. i don't know who I am anymore. I'm being a rebel for no reason.

There's nothing happening in my life.

Random Monday

With Aya and J

Leche! Ang saya lang ng araw na to! :))

No spilling

With Cea, Bernice and Nicole (missing: Alex)

Love 'em to bits :)

Thank you, Mushrooms!

At the start of this Semester, I honestly wanted to crash when I found out that we were reshuffled because that meant no more Triso group. I was so dejected. I didn't want to adjust to another set of RLE group since I find it very hard to establish camaraderie and the fact that I have the tendency to compare them to my previous groupmates. Well, things happen for a reason and through the many changes that's happened to me, I've learnt not question. The answer will always be unveiled at the end anyways.

To Diane, Tags, Ei, Lovely, Hans, Monique, Allen, Pao, Abby and Rhiz, I would like you guys to know how eternally grateful and thankful I am for the times we've spent together throughout all four rotations. There were misunderstandings and we got mad at each other, but that's normal right? At the end of the day, the most important thing is that we all passed and the group is still one. :)

Thanks for the support and for being there during the all nighters. It was a tough semester and there were new rotations but we all got through it. Goodjob, mushies! If I ever did something to hurt any of you, it wasn't my intention to. I'm sorry. Know that I love you and the experiences we had in the Delivery room, nursery, 5th rec and community are always going to be worth remembering. :>

Brain v Heart

I WANT TO STOP BECAUSE IF I CONTINUE WITH THIS KIND OF MINDSET, I'LL JUST END UP HURTING PEOPLE. AND I DON'T WANT THAT. BUT I CAN'T STOP BECAUSE IF I DO, I'LL END UP HURTING MYSELF.

SO NOW IM CONFUSED.

:/

Happy birthday Ei!

Thank for the treat, Ei! We love you!

(We call each other Triso not because we were born with chromosomal abberations. We're called Triso because we're weird when we're all together. And that's not a bad thing. This group showed me that being weird is good because it means you're courageous enough to show people how insane you really are deep inside.)

*Labor dance*

Bang the Doldrums

We use bad words not because we're BAD. We use them because we want to appear strong. We want people to feel that despite all the failure we feel deep inside, we still have the courage to continue on living.

SV. Study vibes.

I'm supposed to be concentrating on my ncm NOTES because there's a quiz tomorrow. Plus, I haven't started studying for physics and pharma which both covers two topics. I'm a dead meat. I don't even know why i'm blogging right now. Hmm, let's just say i'm trying to sharpen my saw in 15 minutes (not helping though). Anyways, im stressed and i don't know why because when I look at my planner, there's nothing really to stress about. My finals schedule isn't even as cruel as before. There's just one exam in one day soooo I have no idea why I'm stressed. Lots of quizzes tomorrow but that has become a usual thing already so i'm ruling that out of the stress list.

Whatevs, break's over. Back to NCM. :|

May Angels Lead you in

On March 12, 2011, My professor in Anatomy and Microbiology passed away. He was one of the greatest teachers I've ever had.

Please pray for Dr. Norbert Licad Alfonso M.D., DPSOHNS.,FASOHNS.,MBA-H. May he rest in peace.

oh oh oh to touch and feel a girl's ... ah heaven! ;P . We love you, sir! :)

Prayers to Japan

Japan has always been my second favorite country in Asia and It has always been one of the countries I dream of visiting. I have relatives in Japan and know quite a few people from there. Japanese are very friendly, they don't deserve any of these disasters. I pray for them...

...to the people who died, to the people who have lost their loved ones, to the people who were affected by the earthquake, to the people who lost their homes, to the people who thought that it was just another day to get through, to the people who became heroes, to the people who saved and were saved...

There are a lot of things happening in the world right now - wars and natural disasters. What happened to Japan could've happened to any of us, it could happen right at this moment - to me, to you, to your friend, to your family.... and I think it's time that we all stop being indifferent. Let's all PIONEER RADICAL CHANGE.
>

*I really hope people would just go to coffee shops and talk about their conflicts, shed some tears and learn how to forgive.*

Starbucks 40TH

-2010

2011 -

I honestly think that the old one was better, whatcha think? :\

Removing the word Starbucks around the siren looks like brand suicide to me.

Although I know the taste wouldn't be any different but still. :(

Living it up

This is an excerpt from my PMSD book report.

Now, I’m a student nurse going through duties, case studies, ward classes and a whole bunch of stress and maybe – just maybe I’m starting to fall in love with the course. I’ve tried asking friends if they could see me as a nurse in the future and most of them say that they don’t or can be. I never actually got an affirmative “yes” to that question. Most of them say that I’m more of a person on the commanding side – someone who is independent and can work alone but still be excellent. I’ve thought about what others say and it made me realize that they say I can’t become a nurse because the see nursing in a totally different angle. Nursing, as how others perceive it – is just the act of following doctor’s orders. But in reality, it’s very, very far from that. Actually, with the subjects and the things that we are learning right now, it’s already like we’re studying medicine itself. I honestly have been thinking twice if this profession is really for me because the work load of being a nurse is more than what I can take. Being a student nurse is tiring – it drains up all your energy and it entails a lot of sacrifices. There are even times when I wonder what reward I get from all of this. Nursing isn’t even a highly paid job in the Philippines.

In the story, Tilda has inspired me to keep on moving forward and to just go on. Sometimes, life gives you trials and challenges which may seem so impossible to solve but one way or another you get through them anyway. Then, at one point in time you’ll realize that these are only tests to make you better. Tilda has taught me that nursing is a rewarding personal endeavour. Nursing doesn’t give you the bucks and the golds. But through the service of caring for people who are complete strangers to you and being at their sides at most difficult time, that’s when your minds open to the fact that fame and fortune are incomparable to the self fulfilment and love you get from nursing. Moreover, Tilda has inspired to be hopeful. For nurses, suffering and death aren’t form of hopelessness. For us, providing comfort, promoting their well being and not treating them any less of a human is what makes our job hopeful. More importantly, she inspired me that in nursing, it’s all about loving the work you do because when you learn how to love all else transpires.

You are my sweetest downfall

I've been really down these past days because of this problem I have which i cannot expose to the whole world. PREGNANT? hell no! :))

Anyways, I'm making this short post because while I was making this whole drama thing alone in my room and tweeting them out on twitter, two great twitter friends comforted me. They live in the other side of the world and I haven't met them in person. I was just really amazed how much they can sympathize and empathize with me. I was very surprised that they even bothered to reply to me because usually, we just chat when there's an LFC game. I guess, it's also the football love and the "you'll never walk alone" tag that connects all LFC fans out there. Well, i'm just super thankful for the virtual hugs.

The world is full of love, my dear friends. :) No need for hate.

Pharmaco....LOMO!

*hello eyebags :P

sabaw blog title HAHA!

Anyway, Tamad to make blog posts so just to have another entry for the month of feb....Here are pictures we took during our pharma class. :>

Today, I finally submitted my Individual Case Study so now I fell so FREE.

*credits to bri for the pictures

To the limit

I PROMISE TO STUDY RIGHT WHEN I GET HOME AFTER BEAT THE ODDS TONIGHT.

NO EXCUSES.

G? G!

:> :> :>

Midterm Week

I really cannot find the words or construct the right sentences that would describe my midterm week. Last week's midterm was probably the toughest out of all the stressful weeks of my life. It was my very first to experience just an hour and a half of sleep for 2 consecutive days (though I know that the only person liable for this is myself due to my inability to manage my time wisely).

I didn't really study that hard though, most of my time was spent making kwento with my brother or eating my midnight snack for more than an hour and dancing in front of the mirror for another hour to get my energy up (but ending up getting tired after) then another 30 minutes thinking if i should just sleep first and study later. So yeah, as you can see I procrastinate...a lot.

It as been my problem since forever, I cannot seem to find my "studying time." I know that my brain is at its maximum at midnight but my body just wants to sleep during that time. So I dont really know how to fix this problem haha. I hate the fact that there's no 24 hours coffee shop in sucat. I can concentrate in coffee stores even if there are a lot of people...i dont know, it's the environment, the ambiance and the fact that no one bothers to disturb you.

Anyways, midterm week is done. Can't believe I survived. haha. I'm very thankful for my friends, like SUPER! as in I wouldn't have survived without them. :) Even though we were stressed, we just kept on laughing during our group study at Starbucks. SATURDAY WAS ONE OF THE BEST DAYS OF MY LIFE!!!! :> As in john and I were just laughing for 15 minutes non stop and it's been a while since i laughed like that so yeahh...ang saya! :))

On our way to Amici. John was pretending to be a statue.

EATING is the best stress reliever.

John studying for nutrition

Mapagpanggap :>

okay, eya. Ikaw na smart.

A date with Marga

With Midterms just around the corner and left and right submissions of Case studies, Concept maps and Nursing Care plans, It's been really hard for me to meet up with my first year college barkada (because our sections were reshuffled last year). I mean we rarely hang out and sometimes we don't even see each other in school.

So last Tuesday and Wednesday, I finally got to talk to Marga (We haven't talked for the longest time). We were at SB for 3 hours both days we never got bored. Even if we aren't really the type of friends who would sit down somewhere and share stories or talk over the phone every night.

( I missed you Margs! This was like our ultimate bonding experience haha! but seriously! I like sharing kwentos with you. )

I was reviewing for Pharmacology Unit test while Marga was talking about her love life. HAHAHA! We don't talk about the same things but we manage to understand each other :)

Plus, thank you to the Barista (the name's JP, if i'm not mistaken) for giving us free short peppermint mocha! YEY!

Me and Margs!

I had See's with me and Marga had carbonara (no picture though)

I also got to watch our old chem lab videos during first year on Marga's phone and I terribly miss those days! :(

Although I've been stressing on a lot of things these past few days, I realized that there are really lots of things to be happy about everyday! So smile :)

Studying is awesome :|

This photo was taken Jan. 5 at Starbucks while I was reading and writing down notes about Maternal and Child Health Nursing.

I haven't been blogging because there's no internet here at home...and I'm on the veranda right now since there's Globe Tattoo signal here. kawawa :(

School's dragging...as always but oh well, I have no choice but to deal with it anyways...

Gotta kick ass this week. Midterm's just around the corner and I have to get my old studious nerdy antisocial self back in the scene and make it last for at least a week :))))

Resolutions

My New Year Resolutions are those you can probably find in everyone's. It's not something kakaiba. I actually wrote em down on my planner so I can read them everyday and I'm posting it here so that you can constantly remind me, if ever, i mean in any way you can :P

1. Lose Weight

My number one resolution every year haha and believe me, I'm getting heavier every month. And that's something I have to control coz my BMI is this close to overweight. I just need to lose some extra pounds in there and i'm good. I know I'm making it sound easy but I know that you'll agree with me if I say that losing weight is the toughest challenge ever. It's never easy. It entails a lot of sacrifices (which I'm willing to take). But no worries because I don't intend to crash diet, well hopefully (because i associate diet to not eating anything at all). I don't want to have an eating disorder and end up in the hospital at the end of the year. Note to self: Diet is eating healthy not dying of hunger.

2. Drink more water, less coffee

Everyone who knows me can justify that I'm caffeine addict. I can't work without coffee in my system. It became such a habit and the psychological effect (that drinking coffee will fuel me up especially for studying) adds to it so goodluck with that. This is actually harder than losing weight because I can survive a day without eating my favorite food but I cannot, I REPEAT, icannot live a day without a sip of coffee. So I wrote there less rather than noting at all because, honestly, coffee is a great help during my "all nighters" or when I'm stressed. I still don't know how less is less, though. suggestions? :> Anyway, I need to love water this year. I've been so addicted to coffee and iced tea that I can just live a day without water, which isn't supposed to be. So yeah, more water... as in 10 glasses of water a day. It's healthier and it doesn't stain my teeth (unlike coffee).

3. Save money and keep track of your spending

I'm not good with money...actually I'm very bad at handling money. Once I know I have the money to spend, i just go vavaboom and the next thing I know there' nothing left to save. I know, it's unacceptable especially at my age where I'm supposed to be learning how to save for whatever reasons (for med school?!). I get more than enough allowance a day but I still can't get myself to spare some money in my wallet. Yeah, I usually end the week empty handed. If i save money and become like the thriftiest person in the world, I could probably afford to buy a pair of shoes or three decent branded clothes. Also, I need to keep track of my spending to make sure that I only buy the things I need and not those that I want. I'm half blaming Starbucks for this (so i'm trying to tell myself to just go to Starbucks every Sundays which is unideal because there's a freakin' SB store right in front of my school. Whatever, I'll just pretend it doesn't exist) because most of my allowance go there. The other half of the blame is me, for not learning how to resist the temptations most especially for food. So, Sydney, save your freakin' money.

4. Increase your knowledge

They say knowledge is power, knowledge is everything. It'll help you go forward and it'll make you successful in the future. I grew up with people telling me that studying is the only key in order to have a good future. If you have a big brain, big companies will want you. If you have a small brain, small institutions will think twice first then accept you. I used to believe that in highschool, although i never really achieved awards back then but it was the driving force behind my passion for studying. I worked my butt off because I want to be successful and rich. I wanted to be on top. But that thinking faded slowly when I realized that having "a brain" isn't really the way to that brighter future. A lot of people who didn't finish college are living the good life. People say it's fate; if that's meant for you, accept it. But i don't believe in fate... itself. I don't believe in just sitting there and waiting for your fate to unfold. And I'm also not saying that I or you should stop studying because finishing college and having a degree is better than having none at all. I remember my healthEco professor who told one of my classmates (who said that she wants to become a housewife, so why bother to even study?) "what?! so you want to be a mangmang housewife? Which made a lot of sense. Just because we want to be this someone in the future doesn't mean we should stop learning something that is not related to it because we'll never really know when we can apply the things we learn in class in the future.

I realized that getting my way to that brighter future entails more that that of having good grades. My mom would always tell me not to pressure myself with my studies because based on her experiences, grades don't even define half of who you are.

(this is getting way too long, I know. I'm not a writer and i dont know how to explain myself well through writing so bare with me, I'm trying to learn :P)

The bottom line is that, When life gives me an opportunity to learn and experience more things, grab it! Knowledge is present everywhere ( it's on TV, it's in school, it's on the road, it's in my room) and I shouldn't be wasting my time looking for a reason why i shouldn't learn things. I believe that knowledge is a gift and it's just up to us if we want to leave it under the Christmas tree or open it up, use and apply em in our daily lives. Learning is beautiful and sharing what you know to others is a wonderful experience.

5. Stop making fun of people's imperfections. Learn to appreciate everyone's uniqueness.

I never knew i would be one of those people who would make fun of others simply because they're something "wrong" with them. I blame the environment in general. It's hard to survive in a place or in a crowd where people think it's okay to be mean because they influence you to be one of them. It's against my nature or it's not me, bullying (in whatever sense or way) isn't my thing and i hate the fact that I unconsciously became one. I feel guilty. Honestly, I've been in both ways; I've been the source of "we want to insult someone because we want to have fun" and I've been the bitchy person who thinks she's all mighty and above everyone else. Being the latter is so much worse. A post in Tumblr says "I'm sorry for passing my judgement instead of extending Love", and I couldn't help but reblog it because I've been the judgmental person everyone would like to hate last year. I intend to change the monster inside me even if it means that the people Ive been hanging around with wouldn't like me as much.

Resolutions

My New Year Resolutions are those you can probably find in everyone's. It's not something kakaiba. I actually wrote em down on my planner so I can read them everyday and I'm posting it here so that you can constantly remind me, if ever, i mean in any way you can :P

1. Lose Weight

My number one resolution every year haha and believe me, I'm getting heavier every month. And that's something I have to control coz my BMI is this close to overweight. I just need to lose some extra pounds in there and i'm good. I know I'm making it sound easy but I know that you'll agree with me if I say that losing weight is the toughest challenge ever. It's never easy. It entails a lot of sacrifices (which I'm willing to take). But no worries because I don't intend to crash diet, well hopefully (because i associate diet to not eating anything at all). I don't want to have an eating disorder and end up in the hospital at the end of the year. Note to self: Diet is eating healthy not dying of hunger.

2. Drink more water, less coffee

Everyone who knows me can justify that I'm caffeine addict. I can't work without coffee in my system. It became such a habit and the psychological effect (that drinking coffee will fuel me up especially for studying) adds to it so goodluck with that. This is actually harder than losing weight because I can survive a day without eating my favorite food but I cannot, I REPEAT, icannot live a day without a sip of coffee. So I wrote there less rather than noting at all because, honestly, coffee is a great help during my "all nighters" or when I'm stressed. I still don't know how less is less, though. suggestions? :> Anyway, I need to love water this year. I've been so addicted to coffee and iced tea that I can just live a day without water, which isn't supposed to be. So yeah, more water... as in 10 glasses of water a day. It's healthier and it doesn't stain my teeth (unlike coffee).

3. Save money and keep track of your spending

I'm not good with money...actually I'm very bad at handling money. Once I know I have the money to spend, i just go vavaboom and the next thing I know there' nothing left to save. I know, it's unacceptable especially at my age where I'm supposed to be learning how to save for whatever reasons (for med school?!). I get more than enough allowance a day but I still can't get myself to spare some money in my wallet. Yeah, I usually end the week empty handed. If i save money and become like the thriftiest person in the world, I could probably afford to buy a pair of shoes or three decent branded clothes. Also, I need to keep track of my spending to make sure that I only buy the things I need and not those that I want. I'm half blaming Starbucks for this (so i'm trying to tell myself to just go to Starbucks every Sundays which is unideal because there's a freakin' SB store right in front of my school. Whatever, I'll just pretend it doesn't exist) because most of my allowance go there. The other half of the blame is me, for not learning how to resist the temptations most especially for food. So, Sydney, save your freakin' money.

4. Increase your knowledge

They say knowledge is power, knowledge is everything. It'll help you go forward and it'll make you successful in the future. I grew up with people telling me that studying is the only key in order to have a good future. If you have a big brain, big companies will want you. If you have a small brain, small institutions will think twice first then accept you. I used to believe that in highschool, although i never really achieved awards back then but it was the driving force behind my passion for studying. I worked my butt off because I want to be successful and rich. I wanted to be on top. But that thinking faded slowly when I realized that having "a brain" isn't really the way to that brighter future. A lot of people who didn't finish college are living the good life. People say it's fate; if that's meant for you, accept it. But i don't believe in fate... itself. I don't believe in just sitting there and waiting for your fate to unfold. And I'm also not saying that I or you should stop studying because finishing college and having a degree is better than having none at all. I remember my healthEco professor who told one of my classmates (who said that she wants to become a housewife, so why bother to even study?) "what?! so you want to be a mangmang housewife? Which made a lot of sense. Just because we want to be this someone in the future doesn't mean we should stop learning something that is not related to it because we'll never really know when we can apply the things we learn in class in the future.

I realized that getting my way to that brighter future entails more that that of having good grades. My mom would always tell me not to pressure myself with my studies because based on her experiences, grades doesn't even define half of who you are.

(this is getting way too long, I know. I'm not a writer and i dont know how to explain myself well through writing so bare with me, I'm trying to learn :P)

The bottom line is that, When life gives me an opportunity to learn and experience more things, grab it! Knowledge is present everywhere ( it's on TV, it's in school, it's on the road, it's in my room) and I shouldn't be wasting my time looking for a reason why i shouldn't learn things. I believe that knowledge is a gift and it's just up to us if we want to leave it under the Christmas tree or open it up, use and apply em in our daily lives. Learning is beautiful and sharing what you know to others is a wonderful experience.

5. Stop making fun of people's imperfections. Learn to appreciate everyone's uniqueness.

I never knew i would be one of those people who would make fun of others simply because they're something "wrong" with them. I blame the environment in general. It's hard to survive in a place or in a crowd where people think it's okay to be mean because they influence you to be one of them. It's against my nature or it's not me, bullying (in whatever sense or way) isn't my thing and i hate the fact that I unconsciously became one. I feel guilty. Honestly, I've been in both ways; I've been the source of "we want to insult someone because we want to have fun" and I've been the bitchy person who thinks she's all mighty and above everyone else. Being the latter is so much worse. A post in Tumblr says "I'm sorry for passing my judgement instead of extending Love", and I couldn't help but reblog it because I've been the judgmental person everyone would like to hate last year. I intend to change the monster inside me even if it means that the people Ive been hanging around with wouldn't like me as much.

Whaddup 2011?!

After..hmm i'm not entirely sure but i'm guessing Four years? Yeah. After four freeakin years, my dad has finally spent his Christmas and New Year at home. This was my Christmas wish last year (My personal wishes during birthdays and Christmas were/are never material) and I'm super happy about it. If there's one person I would want to see every New Year, It'd be my dad because he's the firework enthusiast and the enthusiasm is immeasurable. Whenever he's home for New Year he makes sure he has the best fireworks display in the neighborhood or the loudest. His fireworks are actually not the bongga ones you see in the sky during midnight because he likes those sinturon ni whatever type of paputoks. I personally don't like it because it's wayyy too loud for my ears to tolerate. As in after that two minute of firework explosion, my hearing stopped working for like 3 seconds. But, oh well, He's happy I'm happy, who cares if I go deaf. hahah!

The down side is that my brother wasn't here to celebrate it with us (although, he'll be in Manila on the 11th [i'm mega excited]) but I got to talk to him on the phone and that was the closest way i could celebrate New Year with him. I miss you, brother.

Anyway, I think that 2011 will be a good year (that's what i actually say every year, but y'know, It's better to hope for the better things rather than the ugly ones so, no... don't blame me) because i'm up for the whole "i'm gonna be a more responsible, healthier, wiser person this year." I really have this feeling that there are lots of wonderful things in store for me this 2011(my fingers are crossed).

So, as we all know New Year means a new beginning, a start, a time for change...And this year I plan to really change (in a better way 'fcourse). I plan to stick by my resolutions (which i will be listing and explaining in this blog entry, if i dont get tamad) and follow them no matter what. This time, i'm gonna be strict on myself. I have to impose these resolutions and read 'em over and over again so that I wouldn't forget. I realized that last year, I was such a hypocrite. I would say things to myself ( to do this, to do that) but end up not following them then at the end of the day I would just regret everything...that i should've done this rather than doing that blah blah. and that really sucks.

(resolutions in a different entry)